I wanted to draw this series called Awwwtismo (Autismo or Autism) to emphasize the two extremes of Autistic experience as a woman of color in the USA. I read about the murder of Muhammed Bhar in Palestine. He was a young man with Down syndrome and Autism who was mauled to death by an Israeli attack dog. While being attacked he said in Arabic, “no, no, enough, my love,” because this is what he was taught when his behaviors were too much. He was lovingly urged to stop. Muhammed’s parents had never heard him speak; he was nonverbal, with the mental capacity of a toddler though he was in his 20s. Imagine that his parents had never heard him speak and in hearing his torture they also heard the first words he ever spoke.

Here in the USA there are few protections for disabled people. What’s worse to me is how difficult and painful it is for disabled people to get respect, to be able to live with dignity, due to colonization in the USA and the cultural norms that allow for the abuse of disabled people. I wanted to shed light on the extremes of Autism: the love, the hate. In this first comic, I’ve depicted a trait that my son and I share which is hyperlexia. Besides having a big vocabulary and learning to speak early, my son also double-speaks. He has words pouring out of him. I think of nonverbal Muhammed Bhar and how much his parents must have wanted him to one day say, “I love you mom, I love you dad.” I cannot fathom their heartbreak to hear him say, “enough, my love” and beg for water before dying alone.